Thursday, August 5, 2010

The First Step

In October 2009 my wonderful friend Chris let me know that Dr Pat Baccili had posted a Holistic Makeover contest on her website.  Chris was a winner in last year’s contest and really wanted me to enter for a chance to change my life this year. 

The problem was that it was one of the worst periods of my life.  My father had spent the entire month of July in the hospital and even though he was home, most of August and September were spent either at his doctor appointments or in physical therapy.

I also had some medical issues of my own in August that the doctors could not diagnose.  Dizzy spells that caused me to fall down at odd times combined with a  fear of driving and of having to drive anyway to get to and from work and my father’s home.  And living in a 3rd floor walk-up that had very steep stairs and made me afraid to leave my house. 

In addition, my beloved cat Charlie (more about him in the future) had developed a tumor in his spine and lost the use of his back legs.  He wasn’t in pain but I did have him in diapers as he could no longer get in and out of his litter box.

A lot to deal with!  And now Chris wanted me to enter a contest and tell why I deserved a holistic makeover!  On top of that it involved writing a 500 word essay including how I would pay it forward.  The thought of completing an essay was daunting enough but to pay it forward too?  I was already stretched as far as I could see and beyond.  How would I possibly find time to complete a pay it forward project?

I finally just sat down one day and wrote.  I was so depressed that day.  One of my dear friends retired from our department at work.  My kitty wasn’t doing well.  My family was needing me.  How could I express paying anything forward?  But I wrote.  And I read it and thought…oh my goodness this is ridiculous and the most depressing story.  But I figured whatever the universe has in store for me I will accept.  I will just send it and then I can honestly tell Chris I did it.  The essay was my blog titled “My Story” from yesterday.  I figured that would be the end of it.  I copy and pasted into Dr Pat’s website.  I pressed the button thinking I would have a chance to proofread and a message would pop up asking, “are you sure?”  But it didn’t!  I thought, OMG it went as is. 

So I sent a little prayer up to God and forgot about it.  Little realizing I had started a change in myself and my life!

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